How do you know

How do you know it's time to shave your legs? When your child touches them and makes this face. Several times. The end.

Karma is a Toilet Bowl

Never one to let her mother have the last laugh (or 5 minutes of sleep), Beauty let me have it for that 8 hours of glorious sleep I had after I decided to turn off the monitor. In fact, she let everyone have it that she thought might be remotely involved in the conspiracy.  That's right,  the stomach bug took us down for the count last week. Mercifully, it came in waves so that no one person had it at the same time, and it only stayed for a short while but man did it feel like an eternity on that bathroom floor. 

Since having our little Beauty we've been no stranger to the stomach bug (or runny noses, or colds, or the various forms and sounds of coughs, or any other malady you can think of). If memory serves me correctly, (which it usually doesn't and that's a whole different topic) I believe this is our third household battle with what I consider the worst kind of plague to be brought down on the modern man. 

By now we've gotten it down to a solid routine in our household. I scream at the top of my lungs down the stairs (or into the monitor at the top of my lungs) for hubby to get his ever loving behind out of the bed (step 1). He then takes on the soiled bedding and I take on the soiled child. While this seems to work pretty well for us, it puts me in the direct line of fire for any residual bug that may still be lingering in Beauty's ever so delicate digestive tract.  Anyway,  you get the idea of what comes next... Mommy has taken one for the team 3 out of 3 times  (wait, who said this system was a good one ?) while daddy on the other hand seems to have gotten the mommy immune system I was supposed to have gotten when I gave birth (they forgot to give me the manual and third arm too). However, this time was different,  Beauty decided to be an equal opportunity sharer (we've been working on that) and bless us all with losing a pants size (Hey, silver linings right? )

So that's what we've been up to. Contemplating the meaning of life and the blessings of children from our bathroom floor. I guess I'll think twice before turning off that monitor next time and will maybe opt for washing the sheets instead.